How to feel better when life doesn't go according to plan
Guest blog by Celia Griver at Blossom Hypnotherapy
As we go into a second lockdown, we are all only too painfully aware that sometimes in life, things go wrong. It may not happen very often, but when it does we can find ourselves in situations we’ve never faced before, feeling like we don’t have the skills to cope.
Minds like to imagine the worst
For many of us, this can lead us down a path of worry, panic and fear. We may find ourselves caught up in our minds, imagining terrible scenarios which are unlikely to happen, and imagining how we will cope with them. We relive the past and anguish about the future, constantly trying to find the key that might unlock the answer to the unknown.
Sometimes, we can get so caught up in worrying that we start to worry about worry and be fearful about fear. If this goes on over a period of time it can lead to anxiety and before we know it, anxiety can take over our lives entirely, stopping us from doing the things we enjoy and living the life we want.
Anxiety isn’t all bad
Now, anxiety is something we all experience from time to time. It’s a normal response to things we see as threatening to us. For instance, it’s natural to feel anxious about Coronavirus, taking a driving test or sitting an exam. Anxiety can even be helpful in some situations such as when we need to perform well, or cope in a crisis.
When anxiety takes hold
But if anxiety starts to take over, it can affect
· The way we feel.
· The way we think.
· The way our body works.
· The way we act.
When we feel anxious it can seem as if we have a feeling of dread hanging over us, as if something terrible is about to happen. It can make us feel tense, stressed, unsettled and on edge. Some people can even feel unreal, woozy, detached or panicky.
You can usually tell you are anxious as your mind is constantly on the go, you can’t concentrate and your mind jumps from one thing to another. It can feel as if your mind is on a loop as it keeps on imagining the worst and continually goes over the same worries.
Fight or flight
Anxiety feels bad as our bodies responds to a frightening or threatening experience, real or imagined. Known as the fight or flight response, it’s what our body’s do to prepare to fight danger or run away from it. But, many of the stresses we face can’t be fought or run away from, so the symptoms don’t help. Instead, they often make us feel worse, especially if we don’t understand why our bodies react in this way.
Learn more about the fight or flight response to stress.
When you feel anxious, you can find yourself spending a lot of time and energy trying to suppress your anxious thoughts or seeking assurance from others that nothing bad will happen. Often, we end up avoiding any situations which might trigger the fear, even if these are things we usually enjoy doing. Over time, we stop doing the things that help us to cope, such as eating healthily, exercising or spending time with friends and family.
Combating anxiety
Life is stressful at the best of times. Even more so when we are having to deal with Coronavirus, social distancing and lockdown. It can be easy for pressures to build up. We can’t always control the anxiety that comes from outside but we can find ways to reduce the pressure we put on ourselves:
· Try to identify situations you find stressful by noticing the beginnings of tension.
· Take steps to tackle what it is about these situations that you find stressful.
· Make sure you have time for things you enjoy.
· Get enough sleep.
· Eat a balanced diet.
· Take regular exercise.
· Make time to relax.
Learn strategies to help you manage anxiety.
The good news is help is available for anxiety. The National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) advises the NHS on which treatments to use. NICE recommends Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) for anxiety. CBT, when it is combined with hypnotherapy is particularly effective.
When I treat people with anxiety, together we find ways to change the thoughts, feelings and actions that hold them back. Working at the clients’ pace, I help them to develop the skills they need to make changes. We find ways to manage anxiety, so clients are able to cope with whatever is going on in their life.
real life story
Take Charlotte, for instance, who came to see because anxiety was taking over her life. She was finding if difficult to cope at work and was withdrawing from her friends and family. We worked together so she could manage her anxiety. Charlotte is now more confident and able to cope with difficult situations.
In her own words,
“Hypnotherapy has been the best thing that has ever happened to me. Before my first session I was very sceptical that hypnotherapy would work for me but it has been absolutely life changing. I have suffered with anxiety all my life and tried to access help through counselling many times but this never seemed to work. Fortunately hypnotherapy has been the answer for my anxiety. I am so much calmer in all areas of my life and anxiety no longer cripples me on a daily basis. Celia has been fantastic and provided continuous support, I honestly could not recommend her high enough. Celia has changed my life and I urge anyone to try hypnotherapy - it really does work!”
Activity Helps
When we feel anxious, often one of the first things we stop doing is being active. Instead, we get caught up in our thoughts and worries. In fact, keeping active can help to reduce anxious thoughts and feelings and help us to cope better with stress and anxiety.
Exercise helps us to regulate the amygdala, the part of the brain which reacts to real or imagined threats.
Exercise and focus
Exercise can be a great diversion from worrying thoughts. While you are doing something active you are not thinking about the things that make you anxious.
Relaxing muscle tension
An established treatment for anxiety is deep muscle relaxation as we tend to tense our muscle when we are anxious. When we move our bodies it decreases muscle tension in the body, lowering the body’s contribution to our anxiety.
Exercise releases hormones to help us
As we move our bodies during exercise, the heart rate increases and this changes how our brains work. Exercise and in particular exercising outside reduces the release of cortisol, the stress hormone which can cause anxiety. Exercise can also produce serotonin the feel good hormone.
Learn more about how to stop worrying and stop overthinking
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Celia is a hypnotherapist with clinics online and in Tonbridge and Sevenoaks in Kent. She specialises in helping people to approach life with more energy and enthusiasm. Celia works hand in hand with her clients to help them to become more confident, motivated and happy, so they can live a full and meaningful life.
Celia also helps companies to look after their employee’s mental health and wellbeing and teaches and mentors other hypnotherapists.